Deciding to Become a Single Mother with Donor Sperm from Fairfax Cryobank
Check out this guest blog post by Candice, a Fairfax Cryobank Client, on her experience becoming a single mother with donor sperm.
When I was a little girl, I knew I wanted children of my own. However, I definitely didn’t know what that would look like for me! Like many, I assumed I’d have the white picket fence dream. I’d be married to the most wonderful man, we’d have a trusty German shepherd and approximately 3.5 children by the time we were thirty.
Fast forward all the awkward teen years, to my early twenties, when I believed that fairy tale was coming true. I was twenty-four when I got engaged to my boyfriend. It was all happening for me! Wedding planning began almost immediately and talk of kids soon thereafter. Unfortunately, the wedding bells never did any ringing but, to our very pleasant surprise, pregnancy tests were covered in plus signs.
Spring of 2015, we welcomed our beautiful, healthy and big baby girl. She was the most incredible love I’d ever felt. Until that moment, I didn’t know love. My entire life shifted in an incredible way when I held her for the first time.
Unfortunately, the romance between my fiancé and I dissipated overtime and we separated within the first year of becoming parents. So, part of my fairy tale was realized… or so I thought. Over the next couple of years, I dedicated my life to learning how to be a single mother. During that time, I dated a little but my priorities were seemingly different that anyone I met.
Once my daughter started daycare, she began asking why her friends had siblings but she didn’t. I spent so much time believing I had failed her by not giving her the “perfect family” when one day, something just clicked.
I knew I wanted more children; I knew I wanted my daughter to have a “built-in-best-friend”, so why was I waiting for some prince charming to show up at my door?
That’s when I began researching other avenues and when I met with my fertility doctor to discuss my options, I knew it was the fairy tale I deserved and I was going to make it happen for my girl and I.
My doctor advised me to browse the Fairfax Cryobank Donor Search because she knew I was looking for the best options for my second pregnancy.
I left my doctor’s office feeling empowered and excited. When I got home that evening, I immediately got to work.
I assumed it would be a complicated process but that narrative changed when I began navigating the Fairfax Cryobank Donor Search. I was able to search for donors that fit my specific desires. I knew I wanted a donor with brown hair and possibly freckles, since my daughter has beautifully freckled cheeks. It was something I imagined they could share.
Physical attributes were only a small part of my must have list; I was very specific about wanting someone whose genetic testing that would work well with my own genes.
I was fascinated to see that we were given access to full family histories, personality types, personal essays and in many cases, voice memos and multiple photos of the donors. That gave me great comfort as I felt like I truly chose the perfect donor for my second pregnancy.
After a few weeks of browsing – I enjoy a little window shopping, who doesn’t! – I chose my donor, placed my order over the phone, which took less than five minutes, I might add!
Today, I am living the fairy tale that the little girl in me truly dreamed of – she just didn’t know it could be this magical.
On Christmas Day, 2020, I went for my last IUI and it was successful! September 10, 2021, I welcomed my beautiful son. A real-life prince charming for my very own.
My baby girl now has a little brother. I now have two babies. I am a single mother and my heart has very been as full of love and purpose as it is now. My goal is for my children to know love. The love of their mother truly CHOOSING them. Choosing them as my family.
I am so thankful to Fairfax Cryobank for removing any of the guesswork from such a huge life decision. Thankful for all the testing the donors are required to partake in. All the gathered information that is made available to us. They go above and beyond to ensure an uncomplicated experience.
My daughter, son, our future German shepherd and I, all thank you!
– Candice xx
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